SNIPPETS

APRIL 24,  2010

Bulletin from the Daily Beast:  John Edwards will testify under oath about his relationship with mistress Rielle Hunter, facing questions about the infamous sex tape and whether he spent campaign funds to hide the relationship.

Under oath?  Does that make a difference with John Edwards?  An oath to Edwards is just a chance to exercise his right arm.

APRIL 23,  2010

(Reuters) - A third of U.S. teenagers with cell phones send more than 100 texts a day as texting has exploded to become the most popular means of communication for young people, according to new research.

Imagine:  Some of those kids will grow up to be president.  Imagine what those silly text messages will be worth.

APRIL 22,  2010

LANCASTER, Pa., April 21 (UPI) -- Students at a Pennsylvania college said a time capsule buried in 1990 is proving difficult to locate, despite pictures submitted by an alumnus.  The Franklin and Marshall College students said they have been searching for the time capsule since October and hoped pictures recently submitted by an alumnus would lead them to the location, WGAL-TV, Lancaster, Pa., reported Wednesday.

How difficult can this possibly be?  And...who digs up a time capsule after only 20 years?  Patience, kids.  Patience.  Wait at least a hundred.

APRIL 21,  2010

From London's Telegraph:  Paul Hutton, 40, was pulled over by police as he drove an electric Barbie car, which moves slower than a mobility scooter, near his home in Essex.  Mr Hutton...admitted being a 'complete twit'.  Speaking after the hearing at Colchester magistrates court, he said:   "Originally it was a pink Barbie car but I put bigger wheels on it but it's not fast."

At least he was man enough to upgrade the Barbie car.  Maybe there won't always be an England.

APRIL 20,  2010

BOWMANVILLE, Ontario, April 19 (UPI) -- A town east of Toronto refused to allow a 3-year-old Labrador retriever to register as a mayoral candidate Monday for municipal elections this fall.  Marven Whidden took Genny on a leash into the Bowmanville town hall to register her as a candidate but was flatly turned down by clerk Patti Barrie, the Toronto Star reported.

I don't blame them.  Our own experience with dogs in high office hasn't worked out.

APRIL 19,  2010

BULLETIN:  CAUSE OF EARTHQUAKES FOUND:

From AFP:  A SENIOR Iranian cleric has claimed that dolled-up women incite extramarital sex, causing more earthquakes in Iran, a country that straddles several fault lines, newspapers reported today.  "Many women who dress inappropriately ... cause youths to go astray, taint their chastity and incite extramarital sex in society, which increases earthquakes," Ayatollah Kazem Sedighi told worshippers at overnight prayers in Tehran.

I'm relieved.  I'd always thought it was global warming.